Trying for a baby

Trying for a baby 

 

My husband and I decided we wanted to start our family. I started researching in march. What I mean by researching is my birth control. When to take it out? How long before you're regular? Etc.

I never thought Getting pregnant would actually be difficult. I don't understand how many couples accidentally get pregnant. It's now October and I don't want to say I'm infertile.. but I had labs done with my nurse practitioner which showed my progesterone levels at a .2 (they like to see 15) I've also tracked my BBT which has not changed at all. 

Sooo this is what is considered infertile. I know couples who have been trying a lot longer than us so it's hard to say I'm infertile so soon. It feels like we have been trying forever now. 

My NP has prescribed clomid for us to try this upcoming cycle. 

I was using birth control for 11 years with little to no breaks. I'm hoping the clomid helps my body normalize and start doing what it's supposed to do! 

Fingers crossed ❤️❤️❤️

Letting Go

 In middle school and high school I wanted so badly to be liked that I was never myself. In turn I could hear people call me annoying. I never wanted to be alone, so I had boyfriends. Unsure if I even liked them, even more unsure if they liked me. 

As you grow older, you are taught that those those years of your life hardly matter. If only you could understand that then! 

Looking back, I wish I had been myself more. Practicing not being yourself for so long you actually suppress who you are and lose your identity. Now you have to learn to let go. 

 

How do you let go ? Good question. 

I know I haven't let go because I've carried this weakness with me. Going through different groups of people, dating different men, liking what they like but subconsciously lost. 

So, how do you let go? First thing is, finding yourself. Who are you ?